I woke up today stressed out because I know this week I have to work in Final Cut for a big project and I don’t know how to use it. I woke up with a headache that remained from last night. I gave my Tuesday and Friday shifts to Dave. I got a too-big cup of iced coffee, and drank it like it was nothing. I smoked cigarettes. I got to class, couldn’t figure out Final Cut. I prayed on my way to school, I did. On my break, I lost it. It was brewing, I should have sensed it. I started crying, and called my Mom. I was almost hyperventilating. I was just so overwhelmed. I have a lot going on this semester. All these English courses and their readings/papers/journals/blogs/etc. I can juggle it, or scrape by, but learning a new program on top of it was just too much. I Just wanted to cry. I went back, asked for help, and my Professor was good. I figured out how to capture video, convert video, edit it, manipulate sound… so I came a long way in three hours. I just have to breath and keep my calm. Usually I’m good at it. But just like 2 years ago when I was in Brookdale looking for schools and I started hysterically crying, sometimes the elements get the best of you. Fortunately I can freak out for 10 minutes, take a deep breath, and then move forward.


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