ps
i need school to start bc why the hell am I posting 3 times in one day?

BECAUSE- its hot and boring in town tonight.

sometimes its boring. sometimes its hot.

SOMETIMES reno 911 is hilarious. Sometimes always

My 2nd day off

I’m sorry for not following through and driving last night.

Today I was going through my old notebooks and scrap books, and I found a bunch of notes from Kat. She was my best friend all through out high school and I found pictures of us at graduation. It was nostalgic and I thought of how I haven’t spoken to her in so long nor have I hung out with her since August 2005.. the night before I left for Tennessee. Anyway, then I went out with my mom and forgot all that.

Later I went online and who had sent me a message? Why Kat, of course. That’s how life is. It said to call her so I did and she was asking about the slaughter house and told me how she and some of her friends are going to some of the ‘haunted’ places in Jersey tonight. Anyway, now I’m going. It’s so fun how life works. And The Jerk is a funny movie… so far.

I tried Nicorette today. It works. But its gross.

everything beautiful

So as of today, I have money for my bills before they’re due.
I am getting ready for school to start and none of my classes start before noon!
Josh and Shark are going to Brookdale too so I’ll have my support team.
I turn 21 in 3 weeks and it’s going to be amazing.
I have some great friends. I have a great family. I am loved.
God is with me and is constantly protecting and guiding me.

Life is lovely.

Last night was so scary.

I just prayed and prayed and God helped me. He always helps me. I really don’t know why He does it.

But this time I learned from it.

Only 3 more weeks and Im 21.

Im bad at moving on.

Im working on it!

Also, Im starving and why did I sleep so late.. and the dreams I had.. jeez. Eating alone in Fridays.

I really like whats going on here. Some of the people I hang out with.. well they’re just kind of there. But some of them, I want in my life so bad.

Best compliment the other day:
Che how I think of you, he thinks of me.

So I’m horribly vague. I realized that just because I’m affected by something doesn’t mean anyone else is. So you shouldn’t try and reach out to people saying things like, “I want to make this right.” only for them to scratch their heads and say, “..there’s nothing to make right.” Perhaps not scratching their heads, but more or less. If I ever appear insane it’s because I’ve mulled over things for a very long time before ever bringing them to your attention. And by that time, you’ve probably already moved on. My decisions often have me back pedaling.

Schools starting soon and it’s for the best. I need something to think about.  Like Shark, Josh and myself going to Rutgers next year. And saving money. And paying off my debt. And getting that damned computer.

Summer you were everything wrapped up in one season.
I felt excitement, stress, joy, sadness, frustration, rejection, loss, confusion, lust, anger, anticipation, friendship, exhaustion.

I lived. So thank you.