Just quiet down Ché, it’ll all be over soon.

I want Ramen and I just had McDonalds and I’m really friggen tired and I’m so fucking drunk, not to mention a Codine pill.

Lastly, I love my friends and even more so my Dad who will by the way be in Cleveland tomorrow. My RA is writing a note on my door right now so I’m scared.. so is Shari.

I slept in Tylers Car.. We ARE BELIGERANT.

As Shari says- or just said- Beligerance is Bliss.

Cheism: Keep your husbands and your boyfriends seperate!!

Nighty Night.

We’re better off as friends. And our stomachs hate us.

Another great day in Chattanooga. Okay, brace yourselves: Today I purchased (no Tony that’s not the shocking part) a great Boondock Saints poster and the DVD. Other than that I got 4 shirts, another pair of sunglasses… making it the third pair this week.. and a bunch of head bands. Afterwards Shari and I met up with Steak Express and that was pretty okay. Starbucks is a good way to relax after your roommate turns completely dumb on you. Hung out with Tyler tonight a little. I’m really going to miss these kids.

This weekend is packed. Anxiety.

“I’m sorry how I treated you.”

So let me just say, I got the coolest hippie shirt from Gap- I mean it’s pretty damn great. And then I got two new sunglasses from AE because my other ones broke. BUT one pair I got- they’re white and HUGE, I’m talking a rim from above my eyebrow to the top of my cheek bone. Today, I hadn’t showered yet and I just threw my hair up, but I was starving so I wanted food before I showered. So I put on my pirate shirt and my white glasses, and I was in disguise, and people didn’t recognize me. The lady at the counter who took my student ID asked if it was really me. I could so be a celebrity.

So last night I went to Jon’s to get the rest of my DVDs and to rip his Nickel Creek cd’s. I showed him our semester movie and he liked it. Then he put in Eric Clapton’s Crossroads Guitar Festival disc-set. I am in love now with Jonny Lang. Well really, I’m in lust with him. But I also have a new found appreciation for James Taylor- due solely to his song Steamroller in which I will use to seduce someone oneday. And Robert Cray’s song Time Makes Two- I will have sex to that song oneday. So Saturday we’re going to see Silent Hill and I’m so excited! Not because Jon’s paying (though that’s cause for celebration) but because I’ve really wanted to see it.

Other than that, we just had a lot of great talks last night so I’m happy we’re still friends. Actually we’re probably better friends now than we ever were when we were dating. We have better conversations now at least. And I have found myself. And I smoke STOGES and I don’t care who knows it.

I went to the lounge not too long ago to eat my delicious stuffed baked potato, and in the hallway this girl was on the ground crying and hyperventalating, and some friend of hers was hovering over her. I just ignored them and ate. Anyway on my way out I saw the girl was still there, but then she jumped up (still crying and freaking out) and rushed out the door and ran outside. Turns out, the little princess has CRAMPS, and she’s never had CRAMPS before so she’s making her friends take her to the hospital… for CRAMPS. Ha- just die already. You’re obviously a waste of life, darling.

Just kidding.

Sort of.

I’ll part with this:
“I have learned so much since you’ve been gone. And I have done so little for so long.”

“Well, I’m a steamroller, baby
I’m bound to roll all over you
Yes, I’m a steamroller now, baby
I’m bound to roll all over you
I’m gonna inject your soul with some sweet rock ’n roll
And shoot you full of rhythm and blues”

“Shame on you.”

I’ll describe this weekend in three words: Holy shit. Shananigans.

I am eternally grateful for the forgiveness I have received. I thought I lost my best friend at Lee. I probably did almost lose her.

I may have decided to get a tattoo. Anyone who knows me is aware that I’ve never- ever – wanted a tattoo. I’m constantly changing and I’ve always reasoned that I’d eventually grow out and become tired of anything that definite. Yet, nothing is certain, and I have decided on something that I think will always represent truth to me. Something that has meaning. However, it’s still a secret. Atleast until I make my decision.

Hey, I have a date this week.

4:40. Time for bed.

With every beat my heart grows stronger, my skin is soft yet thick, and life has returned to these emerald eyes.

Cause I cant remember the last time any of this made sense

I take back my last entry.

I haven’t published a real post in a while. So, Easter break just passed and I spent it in Florida visiting my family. At first I didn’t want to go, I wanted to go back to Jersey with my friends. But the trip ended up being very beneficial. Being around my family and just plain getting out of Tennessee helped me put things back in perspective, recenter myself and it helped me to figure out what I really want. Also, a recent occurence that I thought was pretty horrible has turned out to be a blessing in disguise, because amidst the pain and confusion it caused, it also helped me to see the truth- the truth being I was holding on to something that really I was ready to let go of. And so, finally, I have. And things have been so much better since then. I’ve finally emerged from the darkest period in my life. I’m resurfacing as a much stronger individual, as someone who knows themselves more. Never again will I let myself get like that, this is my pledge and my prayer.

Yesterday was 420, so we celebrated around midnight (to the point where I can hardly remember what happened), and then celebrated again last night. Except finally we had some liquor. I put myself out there and got what I was scheming for. But he soon skeeved me out, so I left him downstairs saying, “Ill be right back,” grabbed Shari and we bounced. Straight to McDonalds where Thomas was again (“No change this time?”) he was the guy we had two days ago, when 6 of us packed into Sharis car and paid him 7 dollars, 5 of it in change. Anyway her card didnt work there, so we went to Wal-Mart and spent 20 bucks on junk.

Yesterday, Shari locked her keys in her car, or so we thought. Anyway, 3 hours later, Corey and Jared got the door open.

Tonight is camping, finally. Tomorrow a day on the lake. Then, next Sunday, at 9 am, I’m leaving. Heading back to NJ for a year. Talk about mixed feelings: bitter sweet.

However, me and Shari’s 2006 spring semester video is coming along quite nicely. When it’s done I’ll post a link to it.

-Che’

p.s
I like the life I’ve made for myself here. And I love them all.