I am in love with Jonathan Wakefield.

Not so much with Lee University.

Until next time, teach me to cry


Well I’m in tennessee. Crazy shit huh? I said good bye to as many people as I could back home but now I’mhere and it’s going good. Granted, I’ve spent the past 3 or 4 days at Jons, helping him move in and just being with him. I have yet to sleep in my dorm. But tomorrow classes start, and thus, so does responsibility. I hung out with the Jersey crew today a little.. now I’m at my dorm and ACTUALLY on the internet. Earlier we couldn’t get any wireless signal in here but finally we got one. My room mate is cool, normal.. =) heh. My classes tomorrow are at 8, 10ish, and 11. But by 11:50 I’m done. I am getting ready but I’m so preoccupied right now.

Well just wanted to drop a line, I’m kinda busy though. Life is going to be very, very hectic soon.

Until next time, we have the smallest dorm room in Chambers…

crispy shrimp and packed away

This is pretty surreal. My whole room is BARE. All my pictures and wall hangings, my bulletin board, my constant clutter.. its all gone, either thrown out, stored away in the garage until I come home or packed up in the hallway waiting to be put in the car. Today was packing day, I did as much as possible, then Matt and I went to youthgroup because I just wanted to go one last time. This caused me to remember why I dont go anymore (everyone is so young now and no matter what, I will always sit there thinking back to when we had pastor Jon), but it was kinda nice to see pastor chris and everyone again, and it would have been rude I think not to say good bye to Erin..kinda. Anyway, when I came home I helped my mom a little more then I went out to Applebee’s with Kat Sunny and Tina. Bought time I saw them again, sluts <3. Sunny printed out 3 8×10 copies of the Triple D's pictures, and we all signed our names next to ourselves in it. Our waitress asked if we were famous or something because the picture actually looks really nice, and when in the septone color and blown up like that, they look professional, not to mention we were all signing them. But as soon as I got home I put it in a frame and packed it up to take with me. But anyway, by the time I got home my mom had completely finished my room. Its empty, save my bed and dresser and vanity. She was crying when I came in. She just is sad, which is understandable. She's like "You grow up so fast and I still remember you as my baby girl. And Im left thinking, was I there for her enough? Did I do a good job? Because its like now Im kind of just sitting back and watching where you take yourself to." =(

Tomorrow is my last day in Jersey. I cant squeaze everyone in but im trying really hard.

Until next time, its good to bond with ex-enemies.

Im thinking of making another journal but just for family to read, so that my mom and dad and everyone can keep tabs on me. Of coarse, it would be censored but we'll see, it's just an idea.

See ya in November

So today after I was done shopping for a few things I went to britts car and realized I dont have her key. I lost it somewhere in the mall. so luckily tony was her manager at work so she was able to leave work take tonys car and give me her other key. Then I raaaced home because my dad was meeting me at like 5:45 to bring me to his house.. I get there at like 5 to six, he’d been there since 5:30… I felt so bad… and dumb.

I just came back from my dads house. Im on my new laptop! Using wireless internet. Im so happy =)

And I’m talking to Jon, my love. Everything is falling into place. I said good-bye to my dad and step mom and hayley jordan and zach tonight. I miss them already heh, I love my family… and Hayley made me a cute good bye card..almost made me teary-eyed heh. Too adorable.
We played poker tonight, the 7 of us.. ah fun. On the way home britt was telling me how shes sad and over whelmed and how shes going to miss me and she started to cry.

Jon swears up and down that I have an accent… and that when I called after I had just left my dads it was the strongest he’d ever heard it. But hes the one with an accent…. all southern. Its very cute.

Until next time, my dads hugh heffner and Im anna nicole smith…ugh.

Che: blah blah blah… so now Im standing in the parking lot waiting for britt
Rach: But physically are you okay?
C: ….no, no Ive been raped and beaten also, while Ive been standing out here in BROAD DAYLIGHT here in this sears parking lot.. yeah and as soon as it was finished,as im laying on the pavement in a pool of my own blood, I called you. Not only did I call u but I decided not to tell you I was raped until after I told you about the rest of my day..
R: You're such a bitch!
C: What? Im sorry the loss of blood is causing me to black out. Youre going to have to speak louder
R: Im hanging up


So yesterday I went to the mall to go shopping, but my card kept getting declined. THEN my debit card even got declined which makes absolutely no sense at all, so that sucked. Now I have my moms card but I can’t even go to the mall because I can’t drive my car anymore since they took it off the insurance. Kat and I were going to go to the mall but she never called like she said she did. After I shower I’ll call her.. and then maybe my room mate who like doesn’t exist because she never answers her phone.

But anyway I met up with Tony at the mall yesterday and I saw an awesome shirt at A&F, it said “Spitters are Quitters” so he got that and a like 200 dollars worth of other crap. Later me him kristen and justin all went to hibachi. This one wasn’t as good as the one in the Boro but it was okay. Afterwards we dropped off Kris and the three of us went to the beach where we sipped Malibu and just talked. I stopped sipping before I even got a buzz but those two alcoholics got drunk. So we got kinda cold and bored and I was craving cheese fries so we went to the Regent. Good times, kinda sad bc we were reminiscing about our past and we’ve been thru so much crap and drama.

Then today Britt was going out to breakfast with Chucky and his sister for his b-day and chucky told me if I didn’t come I’d be ruining his birthday, so I went, more good times. Now I need to go do my hair and go to the mall and get some shopping done before tonight when I go to my dads to say goodbye to him and dina and zach, hayley and jordan. Ah.. sad.

Until next time, bull dikes are gross.

Im back from the dominican. It was the worst vacation ever, but at the same time alot of fun.. mixed with tons of drama and a pretty okay tan. Im happy to be home, and I have yet to decide how I really feel about it. met alot of cool ppl.. some of which I would want to chill with, other people I hope to never see again (like this Blood I met whose nickname is PCP and while we were at the bar we got into a fight and I told him that if he was my boyfriend I’d have dropped him a long time ago. I dont think ur supposed to fight with Bloods but this guy was a jerk). I was the reason a boyfriend and girlfriend had an all out, blow up fight.. and by the end of the vacation tempers had flaired, there was a jail involved.. we realized the Blue Lagoon (a drink) will always make u sick, and theres nothing like good ol’ american fast food.

Looking back on this crazy ass week I’ve decided Im happy I went. Besides the fact that me and Britt were sick from the food all week, we had alot of fun. And we were on stage last night in a “sexiest girl on the resort” competition. We had to dance. I can’t dance. but I did okay lol

Now I just have a million and one things to do before I leave for school on Friday.

Until next time, Long Island guys try to play games with your head.

Jon.. im still falling falling falling

Okay.. havent slept.. pretty tired which is strange since I usually stay up between 1 and 4 anyway but, ya know.. I’m getting old.

Anyway.. to Jon… I’ll miss you. Read my email whenever you want.
falling. You know what I’m saying.

Dont let your other girl friends seduce you now… you know how rowdy those 9 year olds can get.

Until next time, the bags under my eyes are proof of my youth